HORRORscopes for the week of Aug 21, 2023

Aries: Brace yourself, Aries, for a month filled with frustration and disappointment. Your ambitious plans will be met with a series of roadblocks, leaving you feeling utterly defeated. Don’t bother trying to assert your dominance, as no one will listen to your brilliant ideas anyway. Best to just sit back and watch others succeed while you wallow in self-pity.

Taurus: This month, Taurus, your stubbornness will reach new heights. Your refusal to budge on anything will only lead to conflict and isolation. Your financial stability will also take a hit, leaving you questioning every financial decision you’ve ever made. Remember, it’s always a good idea to cling desperately to things that aren’t working out.

Gemini: Dear Gemini, your indecisiveness will reach record-breaking levels this month. Every choice you make will be the wrong one, leading to a never-ending cycle of regret and self-doubt. Communication will also be a struggle, as your words will constantly be misunderstood and misinterpreted. Just remember, you can’t please everyone, especially yourself.

Cancer: Your emotional rollercoaster will reach dizzying heights this month, Cancer. Prepare for a flood of tears and irrational outbursts. Your relationships will be tested as your neediness and clinginess push everyone away. Remember, it’s healthy to cry in the shower sometimes, but maybe try to keep it down to a minimum this month.

Leo: Oh, Leo, your thirst for attention will be insatiable this month. Unfortunately, no matter what you do, nobody will notice or care. Your attempts to shine will be met with indifference and apathy. It’s time to accept the harsh reality that you are not the center of the universe. Try not to let your wounded ego get the best of you.

Virgo: This month, Virgo, perfection will become an obsession. You will drive yourself mad trying to control every little detail, only to have everything fall apart anyway. Your critical nature will push people away, leaving you alone with your impeccably organized thoughts. Remember, sometimes it’s okay to embrace imperfections, but don’t count on it.

Libra: Libra, your indecisiveness will reach new levels of frustration this month. Every choice will feel like a life-altering decision, causing you to second-guess yourself at every turn. Your relationships will also suffer as your inability to make up your mind leaves your loved ones feeling neglected. Don’t worry, there’s always next month to continue flip-flopping.

Scorpio: Prepare yourself, Scorpio, for a month filled with suspicion and paranoia. Your trust issues will be heightened, causing you to question everyone’s motives. Your intense nature will also push people away, leaving you alone in your web of conspiracy theories. Remember, not everyone is out to get you, but it certainly feels that way this month.

Sagittarius: This month, Sagittarius, your impulsive nature will lead you down a path of regret. Your risk-taking behavior will result in nothing but disappointment and financial setbacks. Your wanderlust will also be crushed as travel plans get canceled or go horribly wrong. Maybe it’s time to embrace the concept of staying put and not chasing every fleeting desire.

Capricorn: Your relentless pursuit of success will hit a brick wall this month, Capricorn. No matter how hard you work, no one will notice or appreciate your efforts. Your ambitious goals will seem further out of reach, leaving you feeling defeated and unfulfilled. Remember, there’s no greater joy than realizing that everything you’ve worked for is meaningless.

Aquarius: This month, Aquarius, your rebellious nature will clash with the status quo. Your unconventional ideas will be dismissed and ridiculed, leaving you feeling misunderstood. Your social circle will shrink as people grow tired of your eccentricities. It’s time to accept that not everyone is ready for your visionary genius.

Pisces: Pisces, your dreamy nature will lead you down a path of delusion this month. Your inability to face reality will result in disappointment and missed opportunities. Your emotional sensitivity will also be on overdrive, causing you to take everything personally. Remember, it’s okay to come back down to earth once in a while, even if it’s just to do your laundry.